Friday, August 9, 2013

Tango Americano

I think I have a girl crush on my Tango teacher.

Yes, I took a beginner's Tango lesson today. My first in the United States.
And it was...not what I expected.

For one, we were partnered up immediately. Unfortunately, not with attractive young men. Or women. Nor with talented ones.

So, my partners' age range was from about 40 to 70. No, I'm not kidding. There was a 70-year old Russian man there today, dancing with me, asking me to "lean in."
Hmmm...I guess I was leaning back? Self-preservation? No wonder I have lower back pain.
p.s. He probably owns half of Montenegro.

Anyway, back to Tango.

My first ten minutes, I was thinking No way am I coming back to this. It was slow. The men couldn't follow the beat, tempo. Kept stepping on my socked feet. Yes, I went to Tango, ladies and gentlemen, in my sneakers. And was politely asked to take them off.
In case you didn't know, you Tango in shoes. There. Now I feel extra dumb.

Back to the men. They should I put this... really really bad. And they all smelled of very strong colognes.
What is it with Tango and long squirts of cologne? Literary every one of them was cologne-full.
And not of a good kind.

Then, I got to dance a bit with the male teacher, whose cologne was yummy, who obviously knew what he was doing, knew how to lead and was nice and cute. So that helped.

But my female teacher. Oh, my. Let's just say, for an hour there, I wish I were gay. Or she were gay.

She was/is British. So she obviously has that uptight British accent.(I like uptight). Everyone knows I'm the biggest Anglophile there is. Oh come on, I have seen Sherlock Holmes and Downtown Abbey about 37 times. Each. I have been to London eight times!

Then she was so fragile looking, gentle, and sophisticated, like a doll. And, oh, beautiful and so pleasant, nice and funny even.

Hence the girl crush. I don't get those often. (Next thing you know, my girlfriends start avoiding me. Please don't.)

So, now, a dilemma.

Do I stay away from all the beat-less, stinky, unattractive men? Or do I go back to enjoy the woman?
That is the question?

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